10th September - Farewell, Lurkers



I've never been a fan of 'lurkers'. You can spot them a mile off. They're always the first to view your Instagram story, in fact, they'll always watch all of them, right through to the end. But when did they last interact with you? Even drop a cheeky comment or emoji at the very least? Too many 'haters' love to lurk, and only use your life as fuel for the drama and gossip they love to create. The past month has been pretty rough, overall, but I'm through that now, and really excited about all the positive vibes and peaceful existence the future is now offering me.

With that in mind, I've taken the decision, today, to perform some 'life admin' and remove all followers on my Instagram and Facebook who have not interacted with me in the past month. A private message, a Whatsapp, a comment, or even a 'like' at the very least. It's not personal, but it's not healthy, either. Those who are interested in your life, genuinely, realise the importance of relationship management within friendships. But the most dangerous souls in our society are those who 'lurk'. If you don't use social media, or are rarely on it, fair enough, I can accept that. But the toxic folk in our midst are those who are always online, but never interacting, only spying. You can usually spot their TikTok accounts, or Instagram profiles, with very minimal posting, but they're following thousands. Nosey, in other words.




You get out, what you put in, when it comes to life, and in recent years I trimmed my own socials down to a maximum of 100 followers at all times, as a few years back, it was in the thousands but I realised, these people didn't want to know me for 'ME', they would just sporadically pop up the week before raves and events, asking me to sign them in to clubs in Ibiza, rather than pay the £70 per night entrance fees. They'd ask if I could arrange for them to meet famous DJs etc, using my contacts list, and relations I have with famous celebrities. I worked for those contacts, and those close relationships, but they just wanted to come in and sponge them off me without putting the work in. They wouldn't be able to tell you what I did for a job, not fully, or where I was living, or the name of my boss. They just wanted to use me for their own emotional needs, and so, they were all disposed of. You're not entitled to take a look into the window of my life, without being involved in it, from my side, emotionally. 

Today, my list will trim even further. Probably by around 50%. If you click on my profile tomorrow, and see 'Follow' or 'Add Friend', it's not that I dislike you, or have any sort of personal problem with you. It's just that you didn't care about my life enough, and have therefore been deemed a 'lurker'. I understand it. I can't be the V.I.P of everybody's hearts. We're all busy and all have big social circles. I'm just a floating orbit in yours, somewhere on the periphery, and that's completely fine. But going forward, my mantra couldn't be more clear. A small, tight circle, is better than a big, open, loose one (steady!). Modern social media teaches us that we need to have huge followings of thousands, but so often, you only 'know' or speak to a really small percentage of these, and the rest are complete strangers. You really want everybody in this world to be able to see into your daily happenings? Because I don't. I'll keep my circle small and tight, and surround myself with those who speak to me regularly, and care about me regularly. Because in life, we owe that to ourselves, if we have a sense of self-worth. We owe the strength to be able to say...




... Farewell, Lurkers. 


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